I grew up without having my father around me. I didn’t know who he was or how he looked like throughout those years. Not because he was dead, but because he abandoned me and my mother. This informed my decision to entitle this article: My Father Is A Disgrace To Other Fathers.
I have been keeping this story to myself for years until now that I decided to share it with members of the public, through this blog published by my very good friend, Victor O’Dyle.
“Your father ordered me out of his house one fateful afternoon, when you were barely 4-years old,” my mother disclosed.
“My offence,” according to my mother, “was because I complained of his reckless habit of sleeping around with other women, including some married ones.
“Since then till now that you’re 10-years-old, he has never given me one naira, let alone paying for your school fees or buying your books, even when you’re the only child I have for him.
“I am telling you this story now because I feel you’re old enough to understand what I have just told you. Now that you’re about to commence your secondary school education, I want to appeal to you to take your studies seriously, so that your father’s expectation that you’d not amount to something would not become a reality.”
I usually feel ashamed when other people are celebrating their fathers and I cannot say anything about my own father, who’s alive. Of a truth, my father is a disgrace to other fathers.
I was sad throughout that day that my mother told me the story between her and my father. After listening to her pathetic but inspiring story, I resolved not to be a failure in life. In short, her story gave me extra courage to love education and to be serious with my studies.
Despite the absence of my father in my life and his refusal to foot the bills of my upbringing, my sweet and hardworking mother never failed in her duties of motherhood. She was always there for me. Not only did she send me to school, she also made sure I was in the boarding house, a privilege that was enjoyed only by the children of the rich.
Because of the pathetic story of my life, l refused to misuse the opportunity of going to school. I took my studies seriously and the Almighty God saw me through successfully.
On completion of my secondary education, on record time, my mother pleaded and prevailed on one of her elder brothers, who lived in Lagos, Nigeria’s New York, for me to come and live in his house, for the purpose of securing a job.
At that time, it was a little bit easy for secondary school leavers to find a job. It’s unlike now when securing a job in Nigeria, even with the highest university degree, is as difficult as the head of a camel passing through the eye of a needle.
Without hesitation, my uncle granted my mother’s request. He even sent me some money to pay for my fare from my village, in the south-eastern part of Nigeria, to Lagos in the south-west.
Before I arrived Lagos, my uncle had already secured a job for me at the Lever Brothers Nigeria PLC, Apapa, now Unilever Nigeria.
In case you do not know or have forgotten, Unilever is the maker of a long range of household products, the Blue OMO detergent, Blue Band Margarine, Close-Up toothpaste, Lipton, Knorr, among several others.
My job at the company was not quite a decent one, but I liked it. I liked it because I was always offered some of the company’s products, free of charge, in addition to my wages, on every pay-day.
I usually shared those free items into three places. While a part went to my mother in the village, the second part went to my uncle’s kitchen, to help support the house. The third part was usually sold and its proceeds saved in my savings account at one of the first-generation commercial banks in Nigeria.
As time ticked and years passed by, I started nursing the ambition of travelling overseas for the proverbial ‘Greener Pastures.’ I had been nursing that ambition since my childhood.
The country that I had in mind to travel to, at that time, was the United States of America, because of my love for everything America. But unfortunately, I couldn’t find somebody who could assist me secure American Visa.
…to be continue next week
P.S. Because of the careless attitude of my father while I was growing up, I am always excited whenever I see animals, who may not be as sensible as humans, but are caring towards their young ones.
As a result of my love for them, I am going to use their photographs to illustrate each part of my four-part story.
